One of the biggest reasons I did not post came on October 22, 2012. That is when my beloved husband of 30 years, Craig Andersen, died of a heart attack. I had been working on a curtain panel of a filet lion but not that quickly. I kept getting the count wrong at row19. I had finally broken through whatever was causing the problem and was at about 25 rows when he died. I could have crocheted the 30+ rows to finish. But I couldn't. I totally ripped that project apart, crying the whole time. I always referred to Craig as my cheerleader because that's one of the many things he was to me. I had nobody to say "hey that looks great" or encourage me the way he did and I didn't crochet for a very long time.
My hands would be idle while I watched television and I did not miss the feel of the hook and the yarn. I was so numb, I didn't miss anything. Yup, I looked at patterns and bought yarn when I was in the mood,, but that wasn't that often. I still continued my crochet magazine subscriptions but nothing interested me enough to make it. I had wooed and won Craig with a combination of crochet (a lion) and banana bread and I didn't want to think about such things.
I'd love to tell you that one day, I got a fantastic pattern or a gorgeous yarn and the crochet block was broken. If I said this, I would be lying. But a friend asked me to make a hat and scarf set for his roommate. And I did, it wasn't anything fancy. Just a shell stitch scarf in a cream color and a hat made of single crochet with a shell stitch brim. I had made up the pattern (well, I can't really say it was a pattern - just shell stitches) that I could do automatically without thinking or looking. That wasn't the huge chip in the crochet block but it was a crack. Slowly I became more interested in my crochet and yarn. It probably took me over 2 years to finally completely break it. Now when I watch television, I have to be crocheting _something_. My hands itch to have hook and yarn in them. I look at yarn catalogs the way some women look at shoes.
And so it goes. I would still need to crochet with both hands and both feet 24/7/365 to use up the large stash I have. And I am dumb enough to buy more yarn ("but it was on sale" syndrome). It is a great comfort to me because out of all the things that have changed in the world, crochet hasn't. Sure, new yarns, different patterns, different stitches, different hooks but still the same soothing ritual.
To me, there is something awesome to be able to have a "hobby" that can help me heal.
And since I am being thankful for that, I should also give a shout out to my older sister Bee (who died 7 years ago). Bee taught me how to knit, crochet and cut patterns out. Without Bee's instructions, I doubt I would have gotten into the needle arts. I didn't know anyone or never noticed anyone doing needle art. Since we were together constantly, she had the time and strangely enough, the patience to teach me the skills. I was lucky. If you ever get a chance to teach someone to crochet or knit, any needle arts, I advise you to definitely try to teach them. You are giving them a lifetime gift, it's almost like teaching someone to read. It opens up a whole new world of possibilities and that person will be forever grateful for your lessons.